When January arrives it's always time for New Year's resolutions - you know, those ones about quitting chocolate or taking up running that you realise a week later were not really a fun idea at all. I often hear people say things like: "Oh I don't make new year's resolutions because people just break them" or "I could do that anytime of year, January is a bad excuse!". Whilst I agree that if you want to do something, you should just start anytime, sometimes we need to help ourselves with a bit of a motivational kick and January - being a nice clean start to a new year, or at least feeling like one (even if it's technically just another day) can help.
I've seen "365" projects a few times before, sometimes photography, sometimes drawings, where you set yourself the challenge to create a little something on every day of the year. I generally don't like to dictate when or what I draw, as I find that never works out, maybe because I find it difficult to draw on demand and I just have to be in the right mood for creative pursuits. The typical pandalion thrives when enjoying a varied lifestyle with multiple hobbies, flitting between coding, doodling, and other creative or geeky pursuits, as well as playing far too many different videogames and not finishing many of them. I've always felt both in my personal and professional life, that I've never been quite content or good at focusing on just one "skill tree". There's just so many different fun things to do in the world! However sometimes the fact that there's so much I want to do and never enough time for it all, means that stuff I would like to do more of can fall by the wayside, purely from there not being enough hours in the day.
So, I decided to start a 365 doodles project in January of this year, with the aim of doodling something - anything - every day of the year. My hope was that I would motivate myself to exercise that drawing muscle more, giving myself smaller goals that would be easier to meet (it doesn't have to be a masterpiece! Just get something on paper). The main reason being that creating and putting something out into the world, as well as observing, consuming and passively taking things in, always feels like a great thing, regardless of what you create. Perfectionism is one of my most annoying traits and actually holds me back from creating things sometimes because of the fear that it might not be that good anyway, so again, this felt like a way to draw but say "hey, it doesn't have to be great."
I love videogames (what do you mean you didn't realise?? ;), and as a 29 year old woman, when I talk about this, I still often get reactions like "videogames are a waste of time", "I'm too busy for games now I'm older", "I create things these days, I can't just sit and play games". As I've said above, putting things out into the world is great, no matter how small that thing is, but I think it's missing the point if you don't appreciate the merit of enjoying the things that have already been created.
I've already written in some detail about how videogames are a fantastic blend of the creations of artists, artists in all kinds of fields - visuals, programming, storytelling, and music to name just a few. I really believe that inspiration is the beginning of all creativity. If you haven't experienced things that you enjoy, that have invoked emotion in you, how can you hope to invoke the same feeling in others through the things you create?
I don't have any technical training in drawing, and I don't see myself as a "serious artist", because for me it's really just something that comes from my heart. Everything I draw just comes from a picture in my mind that I think could be pretty cute, how it looks is some combination of the things that have inspired me over the years, the things I've seen and thought "ahhh that's adorable".
During my personal challenge to doodle daily, if I hadn't been doing much outside of doodling, if I hadn't experienced something recently that had brought me joy, it would be much more difficult for me to know what to draw, and I certainly had those days. But other days, I will have just been to see a superhero movie, or just played Borderlands for several hours and I would want to get those experiences on paper in my own little way.
I didn't get to doodle #365. I got to #176, and then stopped. I had a lot going on with work and moving house, but those weren't really the reasons, I guess I just wasn't enjoying it anymore, and it was feeling too forced. I felt like I was ready to stop, and wanted to go back to it not being a "chore", but picking up a pencil at random moments when I felt like it. And I'm glad I stopped when I felt like that too. It's part of the reason for me making this blog post - to explain the personal benefits of giving myself the project but also that not "meeting the goal" doesn't feel like a failure to me.
176 drawings is way more than I would have created had I not done this project. I feel like I exercised my "drawing muscle" and I helped myself create time in the day to not leave my hobby behind despite the other busy goings-on and responsibilities of life. I experimented over that time, tried different styles for drawing people, tried different characters or animals I had maybe not drawn before. I tried slightly different paper or techniques, I found what I liked or didn't like.
After that many drawings, I still don't feel like I "know" what I'm doing. I still feel like art comes to me on a whim, when I wake up on a Sunday morning with a picture of something cute in my mind and want to get it on paper. But, after I stopped drawing daily, I noticed that ideas would come to me, ways of drawing things would appear in my mind - inspiration from games or people or characters or situations - and my drawing muscle felt on better form.
So, what was the goal of 365 doodles? Obviously three hundred and sixty-five doodles, on one hand. But reaching that number for the very sake of it, I believe would have stopped me making some of what I think are "better" pieces later on, through letting that muscle have a rest. Though it helped and was nice to have friends watching my progress and cheering me on, the project was for my personal benefit - and do I feel like I've benefited? Yes, hugely. I'm happy that the project helped me devote time to this hobby, to try a lot of different little things and break out of my comfort zone a bit.
I'm happy that it resulted in being able to make a lot of my friends happy too, with doodles of their pets, favourite characters, or anthropomorphised versions of themselves. And when something like this happens - a photo of my friends beloved cats, which I turned to doodle form, and somebody else turned to a sculpture.. that for me just sums up how the joy of the things we love is the very thing that can spark inspiration, that carries on over different mediums, different people, and even generations.
So, to summarise - I didn't reach 365 doodles. But I don't feel like I've failed either. I got so much out of this personal project and to have been able to see others get some joy out of it too, that was awesome. Creation should be about enjoyment, as much as playing games or anything else we do should be, and it shouldn't be a chore.
So go forth, play games, read books, listen to music, watch shows, do whatever the heck brings you joy, and I'm pretty sure that joy might make you want to spread more of it in your own little way :)